NUGGET NEWS – FEBRUARY 2014

Wow!  I’m finally getting the newsletter out!  Again!  It will be short and simple, but it’s in production once again! I thought I was going to have to do it on my iPhone, but ATT was here for the fifth time and things finally work!  WOO HOO!  I may even get the addresses entered so those of you wishing a hard copy will find it in the mail.  AND I finally found my Office disc, so we’re in business. Now if I could get comfortable with writing……

I want to thank everyone who gave me so much support and encouragement these past seven months.  The move to Sebastopol has been an experience in itself.  Thank you, sincerely, for making my world better.  It was such a help.

I also want to thank Shelly Green, Rob Kinney and Kris Miller for taking over much of the work load.  It’s members like you who make this club stay alive.  You are much appreciated.

Kris is also revamping the web site; we would like some feedback on it.

The meetings are becoming productive once again.  Members have been putting their thoughts together and are developing ideas to increase membership while getting us involved in the community.  If you have any ideas you would like to submit, they will be welcomed. We would also appreciate the names of guest speakers you would like to hear and topics you want to learn more about.  It’s YOUR club; get involved and make your wants heard.

For the February and March meeting, we’ll be giving a free raffle ticket to anyone bringing guests, so encourage friends and/or family to come check us out. Anyone participating in the Show and Tell receives a raffle ticket.  If you bring something to share at the break, you receive a raffle ticket.

I want to get this posted so I’m closing. Next month it’s back to the highlights from the previous meeting and things submitted by members.

Again, thank you for all the understanding and kindness you have shown me; it’s helped make me a happy person once.

I have had a lot of jokes submitted; now I can share them again! I’ll start with the Blonde jokes…………

A man and his very blonde wife were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning. The wife picked up the phone, listened for a moment, and said “How should I know?  That’s 200 miles from here!” and she slammed down the receiver.  The husband asked, “Who was that?” To which the blonde replied, “I don’t know, some woman wanting to know if the coast is clear!”

Two blondes were walking down the street when one noticed a compact on the sidewalk and picked it up.  She opened it, looked in the mirror and said, “Hmmm, this person looks familiar.” The second blonde said, “Let me see.”  So the first blonde handed the second the compact.  The second blonde looked in the mirror, then said, “You dummy! It’s ME!”

A blonde thinks her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she buys a gun. Then she drops by his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens his door she finds him in the arms of a redhead. The blonde is really angry so she opens her purse to take out the gun. But as she does so she is overcome with grief, and puts the gun to her own head.  The boyfriend yells, “NO! Honey, don’t do it!” To which the blonde yells, “Shut up!  You’re next!!”

A blonde is bragging about her knowledge of State capitols.  She proudly brags, “Go ahead, ask me!  I know them all!”  The friend says, “Ok, what’s the capitol of Wisconsin?” The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy!  It’s W.”

Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US Government class.  The professor asked Bambi id she knew what Roe VS Wade was about.  Bambi pondered the question for just a minute, then replied, “That was the decision George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.”

Returning home from work, a blonde was surprised to find her house had been ransacked and burglarized.  She phoned the police to report the crime.  The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio and a K-9 unit patrolling nearby was the first to respond.    As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his dog, then sat down on the steps.  Putting her face in her hands, she started sobbing, saying, “I come home to find all my valuables stolen, my house trashed, I call the police for help, and what do they do?  They send me a BLIND policeman!”

I hope you enjoyed these as much as I enjoyed them!

See you tomorrow night at the meeting, 7:00 PM at the Veteran’s Memorial Bldg in Santa Rosa.

Kathe Close

SRGD Secretary